We all delete, distort, and generalize to survive. Problems arise when there are unwarranted deletions, distortions, or generalizations. One tool available to recover the original information is called the meta model.

Two powerful meta model questions are “Who/what/when/where/how specifically …?” and “How do you know …?” By strategically asking these questions you can clarify unclear communications.

Beware: if you decide not to give enough attention to the strategic application of the meta model you are likely to ruffle some feathers. At a live training I would joke that it’s okay to use the meta model all the time, you can use your other NLP skills to make new friends. I can’t say that here since I don’t know what you’ve learned!

Poor use of the meta model:
“Honey, will you take out the trash?”
“Sure. When specifically would you like it taken out? Where specifically shall I take it? What trash specifically? How do you know that the trash needs to be taken out?”
[Friends don’t let friends become meta-monsters.]
Effective use of the meta model:
“That idea will never work.”
“What specific idea do you mean? What aspect specifically do you think will not work? How do you know this idea won’t work? How do you know it will never work?”

Where in your life specifically are you going to apply these questions?
What specific ineffective internal dialogue are you challenging today?
How do you know that your communication skills are improving?